odorekijin

If you were to look back and name a single, most life-altering moment in your existence, what would it be?

Mine would most likely be my first meeting with Kurahashi Kairi.

Though I am reluctant to admit it, I have a feeling that this encounter had the greatest impact on my imperturbable life.

⁂

“KURAHASHIII!!”

The last time I peeked through the open door into the freak’s bedroom, dusk had barely fallen—but upon seeing the abode of chaos spread out before me, unaltered since the few hours that had passed, I could only scold him:

“Have you spared two seconds to look at the state of your room!? Just what have you been doing this whole time!?”

Burglars may have as well vandalized the room for it to be in such a desolate state. Kurahashi grimaced at me from over his shoulder, sitting among the rack and ruins.

“What do you want, PTA—actually, don’t talk to me, you’re giving me the jeebies.”

“I’m asking you a simple question, just answer it!”

“I’m packin’ ‘n tidyin’ up~”

“Lies! How could you call that “tidying”!? This is the messiest your room has ever been!!

“It was too late when I noticed anywayyy~”

As he was conversing, Kurahashi folded a paper plane out of a flier laying around, throwing it my way.

“Fly away li'l bird!”

Heading straight for its target, the paper plane’s nose crumpled on my forehead, which prompted an unfiltered, loud outburst of laughter to fill the room.

“YAAAY! Kairi-kyun’s skill is on point! A born-pilot!”

“You-!! Stop messing around and put everything in order at once!”

“Bleh, dun’ wanna, it’s too much. Guess Kairi is just not cut for that kinda stuff—oh, welp, c’est la vie.”

“Now is not the time to harp on details and find excuses. We have to leave this place in a matter of a few days, do you understand that!?”

“Yeah, and?”

“And!? We are leaving, and you have yet to pack away your belongings! You’re inexcusable! Your lack of societal common sense is worse than I had imagined!!”

“Ughhh, and you still put the boring, average stuff and common sense crap on a pedestal. You know that’s why you’ll always be mister Pain in The Ass to me, no matter what, hm~?”

“Enough!!”

Taken over by anger, I kicked a nearby sheet of cardboard, which made a perfect curve across the room. A sigh escaped Kurahashi, who simply flattened and folded the cardboard box before returning it to its original place.

“Aw, don’t kick things around, you hysteric Karen.”

“In that case, pick up your bits and bobs, and start cleaning!”

“Toldja I caaan’t somehow, I’m trying thouuugh.”

“You’re not even able to tidy up your room by yourself, at your age? Don’t you have an ounce of shame!?”

“Not at all? I’m not prideful and stuck-up like you.”

“I am neither of these!!”

“You ego monster, the hell are you on? You’re literally narcissism in the flesh.”

“You bastard!!”

His taunts were the final straw for me, and I instinctively grabbed Kurahashi by the collar. He flashed at me a bright smile in return, as dazzling as the mischievous twinkle in his gaze.

“Here goes his last fuse snappin’! Whatcha gonna do? Kick my ass? Punch me?”

“Wh-”

“What’s wrong, hmmm~? Wanna punch me real bad? Knock me to the moon? That’s why you’re grabbing my shirt, ain’t it?”

“Gh- you…”

If I did abide by his words and raise my hand against him, I would prove his mockeries right.

(He… He’s trying to get under my skin on purpose...!)

“Aw, come ooon, hurry up! You’ll feel like a whole new guy! Just one hard punch!”

“Damn it...! You piece of trash-!”

Humiliation creeping in, I let go of his collar. Kurahashi triumphantly roars with laughter once more, as if to say that he had been plentily entertained.

“Gyahahaha! You goofball! There’s no way you’d do anything against me, I know it!”

“Shut your mouth!!!”

“Nyooo~ Don’t wannaaa!”

“AAAHHH! Fine, have it your way then! But do not address me ever again! See you!”

If I share any other word with this man, I feel like my brain will self-destruct.

Spinning on my heels to leave the room, it was now Kurahashi’s turn to grab me by the scruff.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait.”

“Let go of me! I no longer have business with you!!”

“But I do.”

“Excuse me?”

Over my shoulder, a cat-like smirk stretched on Kurahashi’s lips—unexplainable dread instinctively spread within me in response.

“Can you help me clean my stuff up, PTA?”

Mimicking an innocent child, he tilted his head to the side. Shivers immediately traveled down my spine and through my entire body.

“I refuse.”

“Yay, thank you! Can always count on good ol’ PTA.”

“I told you that I refused!!”

“Kairi-kyun really has the perfect roommate ever~”

“LISTEN TO ME!!!”

All things considered, my veins will most likely pop before my brain does.

⁂

“WOAH! You get things done super-duper quickly! Way to go, PTA!”

“Quit being so noisy.”

Less than an hour had passed since then. The trash that only orders around but gets nothing done (namely, Kurahashi Kairi) was lying on his bed, a manga in hand.

(Why am I in the room of the person I loathe the most, cleaning for him nonetheless...? What in the world is wrong with me...?)

Nevertheless, the room looked far tidier than it previously did; the last thing that remained to do was to clear the shelves.

Exaltation swelled within me—I sincerely wanted to voice, loud and proud, how much I managed to accomplish within such a short amount of time.

“I should have asked you to help me earlier if I knew you’d be so dedicated, PTA~”

“Keep your jokes to yourself.”

I've gone through such length, there would be no point in me backing down now: I'll have his room so perfectly arranged, he won’t find it in him to complain.

Sorting through the shelves, I came across a large stack of music sheets.

“Hey, what do you want to do with this pile?”

“Oh, yeah, I don’t need ‘em anymore, feel free to throw ‘em away.”

I did as I was told, and disposed of the sheets in a cardboard box—perhaps those were assignments and set pieces collected ever since Kurahashi enrolled.

Carefully written, detailed singing hurdles, notes and reminders filled the margins of the scores.

(...Hm, he is surprisingly diligent. I can only command his dedication towards music, although that is his single redeeming quality.)

Though usually insouciant and lackadaisical, Kurahashi faces one thing earnestly: music.

In fact, he is obsessed with the matter, and puts it on a pedestal. I can align with his sentiment better than anyone ever could, as someone who composed by his side.

Even the slightest compromise can’t get past him, and he won’t give up until he gets to the bottom of his obsession, satiated by his achievements.

(I would much prefer for that discipline of his to be reflected in his daily life. He’s such a handful...)

“Hey, are the things on the top shelf going to the trash as well?”

“Just throw ‘em all out, geeez.”

“Are you certain you do not want to give it a look beforehand?”

“Nah, it’s fine.”

“You are so nonchalant about this...”

Following instructions, I threw away the rest of the sheets from the top shelf—that is until Kurahashi jumped off his bed, seemingly recalling something.

“Ah, hang on, not that one!”

“...?”

Kurahashi charged in my direction, now clearly panicked. He rummaged through the box, navigating through the freshly discarded papers.

“What now?”

“Nothing, there’s just one thing I wanted to keep, y’know.”

“Huh? That is precisely why I advised you to look over your belongings.”

“I just forgot, okayyy?...Ah, there you are! Phew, you escaped a terrible fate, my guy.”

Kurahashi pulled out a music sheet—the score of a song I wrote: “Don't back down”.

“Hey.”

“Hm?”

“That… That’s the song I composed, correct?”

“Yeah…?”

“But you won’t need it anymore, won’t you?”

“Obviously.”

“Then why hold onto it?”

“Huh, because I don’t want to throw it away.”

It seems that when humans experience phenomena that are beyond inexplicable, so far removed from what their brains can process and fathom, their thinking process comes to a stop.

　“Why… Why not…?”

“ ‘Cause it’s something important to me, duh? You okay? What, are you losing brain cells already? ”

Was the person standing before me the Kurahashi Kairi that I got to know?

"S-Something… Important? My song? The song that I wrote?”

"Yeah, that's leggit what I just said."

Alert. Emergency protocol. This is a dire situation—a critical one even. Never have I come across such a pattern in Kurahashi’s behavior. This is the riskiest, most perilous case in all of Takatsuki Kagura’s history.

“Don’t... Stop fucking with me!!!”

Through the confused mayhem in my head, I unconsciously began yelling at Kurahashi:

“You are not the one who ought to spout those words! Know your place!!”

“Hah? The hell?”

“I can’t accept those words, coming from you! Especially now! I absolutely can not!!”

“Ah- wai- hey!”

I stormed off his room and sought refuge in my own before my rationale could catch up. Diving into my bed, I breathed long and deep.

(That thing is not Kurahashi... That can only be a creature that took on Kurahashi’s corporal shape...)

Kurahashi followed right after, repeatedly knocking on my door.

“Hey, PTA! We were in the middle of cleaning, you ass! You can’t escape from it!”

I hid under my sheets, trying to shut out the noise.

I’m afraid of confronting him, possibly blurting out more than I intend to—

afraid to thank him, afraid to tell him how important that song is to me as well.

Even if I was not, I cannot fathom hearing those words spilling from my very own lips.

“Hellooo~ you heckin’ pain in the ass, you listening or nooot? I’m talking to you!”

I could hear Kurahashi grumbling from the other side of the door, a sign that his mood was turning sour.

“Shut up! Perish at once and come back to life! Give back the usual Kurahashi!”

“Huh? Speak my language for once. Listen, you’re seriously giving me the heebie-jeebies, you pain in the ass.”

“And you are far more nauseating than I am! Now go away!”

(Even if you were to leave… Ugh, come on, stop pulling on my leg...)

Why must he reveal that side of himself now, of all moments shared and months spared?

“...It’s too late… Far too late to even speak about it…”

I wasn't sure if these murmurs were addressed to Kurahashi or myself, quite honestly. However, hearing how important that song is to him, that… That made me happy—and that is something that I confidently am sure of.

Soon, he will return to his hometown, and I do not know when I will be able to see him again—if we will ever see each other again.

If the course of our fates turn out that way, then, there is one thing I have to say to him.

(...Even if I did, my words may mean little to you.)

Still, I would be fine with that conclusion.

Kurahashi expressed his true feelings so easily that, maybe, I felt compelled to tell him mine. I am not an upfront person myself, and without such an opportunity, the mere thought of telling him how I felt would have never crossed my mind.

The hours before we shall part ways are ticking away——a fragment of time shared with Kurahashi, before it all becomes a memory.

This one and only moment where I’ll sincerely show you my true colors.

Fin.