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chapter one
[Village's Square]
Bradley: Hey, maledictor, tell me: ever thought of buildin’ a family of yer own?
Faust: Never.
Bradley: Haha, damn, that’s a straightforward answer if I’ve ever heard one!
Faust: I partake far more in the casting of curses than the pledging of vows. I thought that was obvious, but I was apparently mistaken.
Bradley: A’ight, tone it down smart guy. Can’t say I didn’t see that one comin’, though I only got half of what ya said.
Faust: Good grief, please give me strength. Out with it, tell me what is it that you want with me now, all of the sudden…
Bradley: Right, so Sage an’ me talked about that kinda marital possibility earlier, y’know, and the kinda future it’d bring along.
Faust: Go on.
Bradley: And y’know how they’re doin’ their damn best to bless ‘n congratulate those newlyweds of a village they dun’ even know?
Well, I had ta dig deeper into it: if it was someone they actually knew—like us, the Sage’s Wizards… Would they react differently if one of our bunch got married?
Faust: That sure is a loaded question... The Sage must have been taken aback.
Bradley: Yup, bang on. They just stood there, eyes ‘bout to pop outta their head. Probably never thought ‘bout that kinda scenario.
But then they went: “If they find happiness in marriage, then I can only offer my sincere blessings.”
Faust: That’s very much like them: the Sage’s sympathy speaks loud and clear.
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chapter two
[Village's Square]
Faust: However, Sage’s Wizard or not, marriage is not an easy decision to make for any wizard.
One’s very own magical abilities are on the line, after all.
Bradley: Ain’t an easy choice fer sure, but not impossible an’ off the table either. ‘Sides, wizards are unpredictable.
If you find that special someone you’d give moon ‘n stars to, yer signin’ to lose yer head down the road—you an’ me included.
Faust: Now you’re just being foolish.
Bradley: But take our lil’ marriage situation from the Sage, fer example: ya dun’ really know how and where that whole love-to-marriage shebang even starts, right?
That’s how that went fer my some of my underlings, actually: just by bein’ fellow bandits or hangin’ out during heists, they’d get ta know each other and become buds.
So whatever it is that may bring ‘em together, once they’d fall in love, they’d be done for.
Faust: …
I suppose so... I can’t say that such things didn’t happen around me in the past.
Bradley: See? Ya never know what life has in store for you, that’s why it’s worth livin’.
Faust: …You’re being awfully talkative today, I’m starting to think that you are passionate about that sort of topic. Those… “gossipslove dramas.”
Bradley: The hell you’re on?
Faust: I heard Lord Snow and White use it that way once before, so… Hm, no, it's nothing, forget about what I said.
Bradley: A’ight, if ya say so.
Anyway, today’s lookin’ good, enough ta make me wanna chat some more with a gloomy Eastern curseworker like you.
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episode story
What-if Scenarios
[Wizards’ Manor—Fifth Floor Corridor]
Akira: Bradley, If… Okay, it’s only a supposition, but if I told you that one of Northern wizards was to get married, how would you congratulate them?
Bradley: …
Akira: You don’t have to look at me like that.
Bradley: My bad, I thought you’d hit me up with a better question than that, like who’d win in a fight, the kinda strategy they’d use, that sorta stuff.
Akira: Well, I didn’t… It's only a hypothetical situation, so why not give it some thought for a second?
Let’s go with Snow and White for starters.
Bradley: … …
Hm, right, if it was for those damn twins…
What do we say ‘bout smashin’ a festive li’l bullet right through ‘em to commemorate?
Akira: Ju, just because you say it’s festive doesn’t make it anything to celebrate for, you know!?
Bradley: Damn right I know. Why should I be celebratin’ for them? That’s sumthin’ they wilfully decided on their own, not me.
…If only one of ‘em is gettin’ married though… That’d be one hell of a gory butchery. I’d be down to see that with my own two eyes.
Akira: Oookay, alright, let’s move on. What would you do for Owen and Mithra?
Bradley: For Owen and Mithra, huh…
How about a festive bullet through their skull?
Akira: That’s literally what you just said!?
Bradley: A’ight, callin’ it quits there. Why are you makin’ this whole deal about me thinkin’ of their marriage anyway, huh?
All that speakin’ fer cheap got me hungry. If you wanna waste my time on stuff I dun’ care about, at least grab me sumthin’ to munch on. Damn it, gotta do err’thin’ here...
Akira: Aaand off he goes…
(I should have gone with the duel to death scenario after all…)